Dear Sonja (A. Wang),
Because I scoured three different cities in LA to find you, in the end ordered and had you delivered to meet me in Michigan, and have been keeping you wrapped up in your box in fear that the snow will do terrible things to your skin (aka beautiful leather), I feel inclined to celebrate your (literal) coming out in the best way I know how – a blog post. Here’s to fun times, chill times, amazing times, hell, even not so good times – I know you will elevate me literally and metaphorically (maybe even metaphysically?)
And I promise to make you my favorite pair – to be worn ceaselessly until you crack and wither.
I now pronounce us better than Brangelina.
(I had to.)